tips

Here are a few tips worth keeping in mind for when chatting on a buddi bench™. These ideas are offered as helpful suggestions not rules. As buddi bench™ is only for adults we respect your ability to handle any issues that arise. But of course adults can be vulnerable & some find chatting to new people & being assertive harder than others. Some worry they may say or do ‘the wrong thing’. We hope the following ideas will increase the likelihood of any interaction on a buddi bench™ being a positive experience & mutually beneficial.

keeping safe

Your own wellbeing is always the priority. 

Boundaries are important. The 10 minute time boundary is there to keep us all safe & comfortable - never feeling obliged to be more than a kind stranger for a short while. Be upfront & assertive if you don’t want to talk for more than 10 minutes or about a particular topic. You don’t need to give any reason for ending the chat or changing the topic of conversation - the 10 minute rule helps us all to keep things manageable & simple.

Consider keeping your private details private. Only give out a mobile number, for example, if you feel absolutely comfortable doing so. If you both want to continue chatting beyond the 10 minutes, do so in a public place such as a nearby cafe.

Trust your gut. If you feel uneasy while chatting please feel free to politely end the conversation & walk away.

If you consider yourself vulnerable or would like some additional reassurance about safety, message a friend before & after using the buddi bench™ so they are aware of your location & wellbeing.

buddi bench™ isn’t a dating service. Please be aware of the possibility of mistaking kindness for romantic attraction. Of course it is possible that buddies go on to be more than kind strangers but this is not our focus. There are plenty of other resources for these kinds of connections.

Keep the following in mind when chatting on a buddi bench™:

Be willing to understand someone else’s point of view, even if it’s different from yours. Talking with people that have a very different take on life is part of the goal of a buddi bench™ interaction. Be courageous & curious. Try & listen non-judgementally & without interrupting wherever possible. Try not to discriminate against anyone for any reason, including gender, race, sexuality, disability or political views. Live & let live.

Be respectful of any information you're told, and as much as possible, keep the chat private. If you share details of the conversation, please maintain the anonymity of the other person. Gossip can be hurtful. As much as possible: what’s said on the bench, stays on the bench. This keeps us all safe. The only exception to this is if you have any safeguarding concerns: advice for tricky chats & resources click here.